The Bittersweet thing about Babies

The Bittersweet thing about babies- They grow
For a brief moment today, I sat and thought about when my first child, Violet, was a new baby. Time almost stood still when she was born, and the weeks and months that followed felt blissfully long, no matter how tiring they were. I’d sit beside her while she lay asleep in her cot, captivated by the tiny, perfect little person we had managed to create, for hours on end. I’d prop her up in her chair next to me while I’d make her home cooked puree’s and spend hours walking around the shopping centre with her quietly sleeping in her pram.

The first year of her life was like a long, warm spring morning. The kind that you want to soak in through every single pore. Time, as a concept itself, slipped away as we were consumed by our beautiful, comfortable day-to-day. And it wasn’t until her first birthday that I realised how much she had grown and how much time had passed.

Two months after her first birthday we found out that I was pregnant with our second child. We were over the moon! Only, from then on out, time seemed to only travel more quickly. Before we knew it I was 20 weeks pregnant and half way to meeting our beautiful second daughter. Big things happened, we packed, we moved and then we moved again. And suddenly Matilda was in our arms, and my beautiful Violet was a big sister.

Life honestly has felt like a big blurry dream since. The kind of dream that jumps from one moment to the next without ever really elaborating on how you got there, you just… got there. It’s undoubtably just as beautiful as those long days with Violet, only now life seems to jolt forward at a pace I can’t help but notice. The mornings flitter past in the blink of an eye, even the early, early morning starts. And it feels as though with every blink our girls get taller, and brighter and more full of life.

It is so bittersweet, to love your life so much. It is the greatest blessing you could possibly imagine, but also to watch it move at light speed aches in a way. I seem to grasp at every tiny moment I can before they slip away.

Matilda is fast approaching one now, and I feel as though the first year of her life hit us at running pace and isn’t looking like slowing any time soon. It doesn’t feel like we’ve had the slow, warm, endless spring morning like it did when Violet was a baby. Less outings, less sleep watching and far, far less home made puree. But somehow, although things seem to move so incredibly quickly, I manage to find the soft and quiet moments with both of my girls. The moments that remind me how beautiful this season of our life is right now. And I’ll always vow to cease these moments as they come, to breathe them in. They may be fleeting, but they are so, SO incredibly beautiful.

xx Em

A Note on Postpartum Self Confidence

Our bodies go through a hell of a lot to bring our children into the world. Things get stretched, in more ways than one and our body goes through some pretty crazy hormonal sh*t. Pregnancy and childbirth changes you, whether you’re up for it or not.

I could ramble on about the details, and there are plenty. But the reality is, like I’ve stated a million times before in my previous blog posts, it’s different for everyone. Some of us get stretch marks, some get pelvic floor issues (lots of us actually hahaha), some wind up with back problems, and others bare scars on their bellies (and some in secret places too, shhhh).

And though not all of us have physical reminders of the tiny life we carried inside of us, 9 whole months of memories from pregnancy is something every mother carries with her in her heart, whether her pregnancy was easy or challenging.

I personally have had a lot of comments on my postpartum journey- not that I don’t encourage it. I share regularly on my Instagram platform about my journey with my body beyond birthing my babies, particularly in my story highlights. I feel as though it is a very important journey to share, and fortunately a lot of other influential mamas out there are doing the same these days. It helps remove the facade, that we carry these babies for 9 months and then immediately return to how we looked and felt prior to pregnancy, because that seriously isn’t the reality.

In my own way, sharing it makes me feel a lot more confident, because although none of my old clothes currently fit and I’m a bit chunkier in some places that I didn’t used to be, I have SO much love and support from the people who mean the most to me.

The reality is, postpartum self confidence, despite the name, is derived from the strong foundation of people you surround yourself with. Who lift you higher in all of your endeavours and encourage you to seek to find the love for yourself that they hold for you, not only as a new mother but as a seperate human being who deserves love a validation.

If you don’t have this support network, I beg you, go out and find it. There are groups of women all over the world who will support you and love you for who you are. Especially in your new role as a mother. And if you can’t find them, reach out to ME, there won’t be a day that passes where I won’t tell you how incredible you are.

It’s also important to remember that it’s okay not to feel perfect with your new body. It’s okay to have a goal to lose weight, or tone up, or even put weight on. Life is about growth and change, and if we aren’t striving to better ourselves then what are we striving for?

A tiny new baby in your arms does not mean you don’t have the right to miss your old body because of what it gave you. But it’s important that you know how much of a badass you are for bringing a whole new little person into the world… stretch marks, lose skin and pelvic floor issues included.

Xo Emily @ Loving Little One