5 Thing I would tell my 14 year old self

We’ve all had those moments where we think… “If I could turn back time”. When I think back to when I was 14 there are certainly some cringeworthy moments that come to mind. However despite everything those years brought to me, happy and sad, I don’t regret a lot of things at all.

2011 was the year I turned 14, all of the telltale signs of angry adolescence hung directly overhead and I had absolutely no idea the kind of effect it would take on me, nor did my parents or anyone I knew really. I was now a teenager… totally unpredictable, right? Well I have a few words of advice for the newly 14 year old Emily.

 

Black eyeliner and a side-fringe never really suited anyone

I get it, everyone is doing it. You figure if everyone is doing it, it must be cool right? wrong. So wrong. Your almost 20 year old self recently debated the whole fringe thing again, then looked at photos of you and laughed and laughed and laughed and then didn’t get a fringe. It’s not that you aren’t pretty, it’s just the world likes you so much better when you can see your eyes without dark pencil lines and hair dangling half over them. And trust me, the world of makeup deserves so much more respect than what you’re currently giving it.

 

Most boys are assholes

And it’ll take more than one to figure that out. AND might I add that just because you might never officially date doesn’t mean you don’t have the right to feel hurt by them. It’s just the age honey, they have too much testosterone than they know what to do with. When the right one makes his move you’ll know it, trust me.

 

STOP COMPARING YOURSELF TO OTHER PEOPLE

For gods sake. Honestly, I don’t need  to elaborate. You do you perfectly well, your friends do themselves perfectly well, so do strangers and people you’ll never meet. The longer you spend trying to justify in your own head why you’ve done better then them is just time that could be better spent worrying about what you’re going to get from the tuckshop for lunch, and god it better be a fresh chocolate chip muffin because let me tell you, you’ll never find anything like it again.

 

Your endless love for squash still inspires me

This thing that you’ve got going, all the training and the healthy eating and the focusing. It is time well spent! I can’t tell you how many times you’ll look back at what you achieved and be so damn proud of where you let it take you. Don’t even second guess the parties you won’t go to, or the apparent “bad choices” everyone says teenagers need to make in order to grow, you won’t make those choices because you will be doing what you love. And it will be 100% worth it, I promise.

 

Don’t let people tell you these are the best years of your life. ALL your years should be

I don’t know how many times throughout high school you’ll hear people say that to you, but it’s a lot. And don’t let that freak you out because, yes, they’re great. But every year after school is great too. And I can’t even begin to explain that your perspective of what “great” really is can change in a nanosecond. Sure times get tough and things test you all the time, but have a look around you, what are you really leaving behind when you finish school? Certainly not your family or your friends, and lets be honest here, those things are really that makes life beautiful.

 

Most of all, stop worrying so much. Everything will work out beautifully, regardless if it was what you expected.

 

xx Emily

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Dear Violet: Letter 1 – The greatest 10 weeks of my life (so far)

IMG_0186The beginning of a series of letters to my daughter Violet Rae, who today turns 10 weeks old.

Dear Violet,

Today you are 10 weeks old. I’m sitting here staring at that sentence and finding myself unable to truly believe it. Ten weeks ago today you entered the world, beautifully and loudly. I remember the instant you took your first breath and filled my ears with your cry, and your lungs with air for the very first time.

Already, in ten weeks you have taught me so much. To trust my instincts; motherhood comes naturally. To be patient; everything will happen when it is meant to, even your naps (no matter how badly I wish you’d close your eyes so I can sleep for 5 more minutes). To enjoy the early hours of the morning; There’s no point in wishing to be back in bed when your smile lights up the world, even while the sun still sleeps at 4am. To treasure every moment; you grow at the speed of light and I’ll be darned if I miss a single second of it. And that there is always more room for love; Before you I didn’t think it was possible to love anyone as much as I love your daddy, now as my love grows for you both every single day I truly see just how infinite and unconditional it can be.

You’re smiling more than ever now and showing us the things you love (and love to dislike). Booping your nose and talking to you, tickling you and bouncing you makes you so happy, as well as bath time just before bed and your play mat in the early hours of the morning when sleep seems to be the furthest thing from your mind. Nappy changes and sitting in traffic seem to be your least favorite things in the world, as well as that nasty runny nose you had two weeks ago that kept you up all night for so many nights in a row.You keep us on our toes thats for sure. You seem to know the exact instant that I sit down to eat dinner, because the second I do you decide that lying on your play mat or in your rocker is not at all where you want to be and you’ll just die unless I pick you up for cuddles again.

I’ve got to tell you a secret though Vi, even though you’ve only been around ten weeks I’m pretty sure your daddy has fallen head over heels for you. You should see how much he does for you, how hard he works. Up working late, and still waking up for cuddles with you in the early hours of the morning, even if it is only briefly. You’re his world and your smile makes his whole day, every day. So never stop giving him those, okay?

For ten weeks you’ve been the centre of my entire world, my every waking moment and every dream. But really you’ve been that for so much longer, and will be for the rest of my life. I can’t wait for every single moment.

 

All of the love in my heart is for you my darling, I love you now and always will.

Love, Mummy xx

An open letter 


To our gorgeous little unborn baby,

I haven’t quite yet looked into your eyes, and your daddy hasn’t quite yet got to hold your tiny little hand, but it’s not too early for both of us to know just how much we love you. Before you make your journey into this big beautiful world there’s a few things you should know.

There’s an awful lot of love waiting out here for you, I hope you’re ready for your 4 aunties and uncles, who are all incredibly excited to meet you, not to mention all of the aunties and uncles who aren’t quite blood but will love you all the same. There’s also the 4 grandparents, who already have a place in their hearts just for you, most will be near, though some will be further than we’ll be able to take you to visit, just remember that although you can’t see it, their love for you will always be in your heart. There’s also 9 Great Grandparents (holy moly right?!) who all I’m sure will shower you in love and spoil you beyond I or Daddy’s wildest dreams. AND two Great-Great Grandparents! Goodness. Not to meantion all the other family members, near, far and in our hearts.

You’ll have a lot of learning to do, but we want you to remember that it’s okay to make mistakes in that learning. After all I don’t doubt that we will make mistakes along side of you, we’ll be learning how to be parents ourselves, so don’t be too hard on us, and we’ll do the same for you, deal? 

There’s probably going to be an awful lot of opinions around about what you should be doing, which milestone you should be reaching and in what time. But we’ll be patient with you, everything you need to do you will do in your own time, which will be perfect timing if you ask us. We won’t be over here rushing you to grow up. And please don’t do it too quickly! 

There’ll be times when you’re in trouble, no matter how well behaved you normally are. And although we will be frustrated or angry with you we will still love you, even if you are out later than you said you would be on a school night or didn’t text us when you said you would. There are far more important things in life to worry about, as long as you’re being safe and honest with us we can’t ask more of you. Eventually we’ll get over whatever we were angry at you for. 

Keep tabs of the things that are happening in your life! Take lots of photos, write down amazing things that happen during the day, keep a little box of notes you’ve written to your friends in class, funny pictures you’ve drawn, tickets for places you’ve visited. We’ll probably have lots of little keepsakes and funny memories from your childhood, and if you keep your own one day you’ll be able to show your own kids, just like I will show you all of mine, even if you think they’re lame.

Isn’t it crazy that only 20 weeks ago you suddenly existed?! And in 20 more weeks we will have you in our arms. Every part of your existence has come from nothing but love, and there is so much love waiting for you out here. Keep growing strong, showing us your little back flips and kicking up a storm when daddy laughs near you. We can already tell you’re full of so much happiness, laughter and light, all of which I’m certain will follow you out into the world. 

I’ll probably have more to add to this letter, more about making friends (and keeping them), growing up and I’m sure eventually girlfriends and boyfriends but for now, we’ll just leave it to, we love you, and we can’t wait to meet you our wonderful little one.

Mum and Dad